xxWhat do you do when you can love some people so much, think good things about them only, never have second thoughts on the choice of your friends. You trust them as you'd trust your own mother. You have all these thoughts in your head, plans for later. Now that school is over, and that everyone's heading their own different way, you see past that. You imagine nothing in the way of you and your beloved ones (as one would say so well actually). Pictures in your head are those of laughter and joy. Same faces, different place, different moment in time. But same familiar faces. Faces upon which I have seen age gradually take it's tole.
But all that's, it's all just a dream really. Nothing, really. All imagination.
So what happens, hey, when you realise your life is just a dream. And that dream suddenly collapses and is torn to pieces by the very ones you'd do anything for. For we cannot escape the truth. It is around the corner. Now, or later perhaps, it will inevitably arrive. Turn the page on all those ideas, dreams, plans for the future? Seems difficult, but not impossible. I'm sure those faces and those pictures of us on the beach, at night, crowded around a little fire we've lighted, with our marshmellows grilling, those faces full of joy, of everlasting happiness, they'll go. They'll be forgotten. They're a dream for now, and they'll stay just what they are. A dream. A little something inside someone's head, which won't ever be shared, and will stay inside that head someone has. Too much imagination? Perhaps. Is that what leads this one particular person to being deceived time and time again, to being heartbroken?Not by a silly boy who once eneterred and exited her life, but by people she could one call hers, her friends, her very own friends... Well, I believe so.
It is time to grow now. Time for the younger birds to spread their wings and fly, time for me to move on with my life.
Somehow, I must thank those people. Because, you see, although they are the cause to a great pain inside me right now, I've learnt from it. It isn't hatred I feel towards them. No, I guess deep down I still kind of love them really. But that's the whole job that's about to begin I guess. I have to forget them. Like I have other people in the past. But these ones are different. And I believed it so much I gave them all my trust ad all my love.
Too much trust, too much love, that's what I gave them.
xx